Uncategorized Category Archives

employee of the millennium

18 March 2009 | Uncategorized | 102 Comments

INT. DAY - DUANE READE
CUSTOMER approaches CASHIER with single purchase. That purchase is BEANO, a dietary supplement that more often than not bars the voluble and/or odoriferous processes that accompany the digestion of complex sugars.
CASHIER
You find everything you need?
CUSTOMER
Yezzir.
The CASHIER picks up BEANO.
CASHIER
Huh. What’s this?
CUSTOMER
(mildly flustered)
It’s, like, you know how certain foods–vegetables, beans–
CASHIER
Oh, it’s like [...]

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No Romo

8 September 2008 | Uncategorized | 1 Comment

This is what you made me do, Colts. Losing to Kyle Orton like that. At home. On your new field. Shame on you.

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Funna’s What I Got, Li’l Homie

1 August 2008 | Uncategorized | 57 Comments

Happy birthday, Kuchi!
Love, K & P

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